Your father didn't spend nine months carrying you around, dealing with morning sickness, or piling on pounds. He did however put up with your Socratic barrage of questions, repeated requests for spending cash, and other general annoyances. Also, he either passed on important tips about shaving with (or against?) the grain or dealt with a succession of your adolescent, would-be suitors. For all that and more, you owe him something special come June 21st. Sure, shopping can be a pain but worry not, we've done most of the work for you. Welcome to the Martiniboys.com Father's Day Guide.
The beginning of a beautiful bender doesn't require specific impetus, but it does call for a decent libation. |
Unlike an evening spent watching Seinfeld reruns in silence, this drink spices up a long relationship. |
You think you're a world-class drinker, but the Spanish can still teach you a lot, especially pronunciation. |
You shouldn't fly drunk (you knew that already, didn't you?). But after landing, knock 'em back French-style. |
Though the "fruit" suffix seems redundant, it actually eases the guilt of what follows. |
You're not sure if we're talking herbs or prophets, but you definitely like the "high" part. Good enough. |
For decade after decade, Tom has been getting people soused. Thus, he's a time-tested party guest. |
In Japan, they're drinking when you go to bed and again when you wake up. Try to catch up. |
I barely remember Spain and it was one of the best months in the history of me. |
The most summery of fruits meets the most summery of onomatopoeia. Now find a patio. |
There's only one rule: do not say "feeling peachy," else Peaches will beat your drunken ass. |
You're still wary after the foggy Mr. Clean debacle but this one won't end with a stomach pump. |
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