Your eyes begin to involuntarily shut; cruising the internet begins to become a tiresome chore; and sweat isn't the result of your body overheating but an activity. No, you are not coming down with the H1N1 virus, you are simply suffering from Hump-day blues. One way to cure this particular affliction is to twiddle your thumbs and wait for Thursday to come or better yet head to The Modern's 2-year anniversary. Now, stop right there, if you are currently envisioning snooty art critics waxing poetic on the contingencies of time while staring at a concrete sculpture, you are on the wrong track. The Modern is no museum, rather it's a full scale dance club that just happens to be celebrating its explosion onto the scene. Featuring a live set by Los Angeles-based, DJ Fashen, the evening – full of fancy cocktailery and fancier people – will by no means be dry. Whet your Pallet Here. The Modern Anniversary Party is Tonight (Wednesday, November 18). While Jan Arden might not be the biggest motivator to lift you out of your Wednesday slump, the Calgary born songstress will definitely appeal to your sensitive side. The Vagina Monologues, Michael Buble and cardiomyopathy have all been facets of Arden's career. Whether you like Arden or not, it's impressive that she can put her vagina and Michael Buble in the same sentence…Just saying. Jan Arden plays the Queen Elizabeth Theatre Tonight. More cushion for the pushin' here.