Over the course of their adventure, rivalries blossom, allegiances are broken, romance is questioned, ships are blasted into pieces and death is waiting beyond the horizon. Most of which we've seen in prior installments, just with more hero-villains, more special effects and rougher waters (expect to stumble out of the theater in a Dolby-induced haze).

And, really, there are rough waters ahead for those with short attention spans. Director Gore Verbinski and producer Jerry Bruckheimer have managed to save the worst for last; while Depp is in fine form as Jack Sparrow and the special effects and makeup are top-notch, this remains a sequel that is sadly disappointing. Jack Sparrow seems to be offering up his own film review when he says, "Just close your eyes and pretend it's a bad dream. That's how I get by."